Why did the poor dog chase his own tail?
He was trying to make both ends meet.
What was so bad about the Fourth of July picnic?
Why do crabs never give to charity?
OK, that's enough fish puns.
Why are grandparents always smiling?
What do married cats say to each other when they're upset?
What dog never pays attention in class?
What do you call a clock on vacation?
What did the pecan say to the walnut?
Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E?
What do dogs drink when they're sick?